Whose Love Do You Need?


Merry Christmas everyone! May your holiday season be merry and bright, and not because you polished off half a bottle of Aunty Edna’s raspberry wine, or have sampled Uncle Louie’s homegrown left handed cigarettes.  But I hope you are bursting with bubbly joyfulness because you know you are loved and cherished, not just by your family and friends but more so that you are loved and cherished by you—By the person, you see looking back at you each morning in the mirror.

I hope with all the hope I have that you experience a healthy dose of self-love this upcoming year and all the way into your future. Not only that but I hope all the self-love you cultivate sticks to you like tree sap on a Sasquatch. (And to all my perverted friends out there, the self-love I’m writing about comes from the heart— not from the hand.)

Maybe you are one of those people who has already discovered how to love themselves despite our judgemental society, or uninspired upbringing. If this is you, then you have unlocked life’s most valuable lesson. You know you are irreplaceable.  You have realized that when you dance to the rhythm of your own song you are vivacious. You have the knowledge that you are responsible for your own happiness, and you need to be your own personal hero because nobody is coming to save you.

Make no mistake, finding self-love isn’t a splendid stroll in the park. It’s a frightening walk in the deep dark forest of your mind. It’s the place inside you where your internal sneering self-talk is the sharp-fanged monster ready to tear your aspirations into shreds. Knowing you need to ignore that voice and being able to do it are two different things.

For instance, I get it. I know I’m supposed to love myself. I can totally appreciate that I would be further ahead in life if I could practice self-acceptance in each and every moment in my day. Yet, so far I haven’t been able to do that.  The blatant voice of self-judgement is insidious. Lately, it’s been whispering, and sometimes even screaming, ‘underachiever’ into my subconscious at every pause in my thoughts. It’s slightly depressing. Perhaps it’s because there is a twinkling of the truth.

Alas, we all have our own fiends to slay. And by the Gods of Oden (I’ve always wanted to write that), it’s not easy to nurture the love for oneself. So, in the spirit of the upcoming New Year that is wide open with possibilities, I am here to remind you, and me, that a steady stream of love and compassion towards oneself will vanquish our demons in the end.

I am honoured to be your friend, your family, and your companion on this journey of life. I wish you many blessing today and for the rest of the days to come.